Are you excited about the 118th Congress? If not, you’re a communist.
True, the U.S. Senate is still in the hands of the godless Democrats who want to destroy America, but the House of Representatives now belongs to Republicans, the party of God, AK-47s, F-150s (and not the electric kind, either), manliness, Merry Christmas, and our lord and savior Donald Trump.
(Unless Ron DeSantis looks more electable, of course).
Kevin McCarthy will probably be House Speaker, taking over from the She-Devil of San Francisco. It’s not a guaran-damn-tee, mind. The man messed up when he said President Trump should “accept his share of responsibility” for that normal tourist visit to the Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021, and some of us in MAGA-world were not real happy.
Come on, what responsibility? Everyone knows that mixed in with normal tourists carrying Confederate battle flags and accidentally beating police officers were a bunch of Black Lives Matter radicals wearing whiteface.
However, Mr. McCarthy has since mended his ways, going down to Mar-a-Lago and prostrating himself before our Real President on one of those priceless all-acrylic carpets festooned with classified documents.
Come January, he’s going to do the right things, the very, very right things, including investigate “Dr.” Anthony Fauci. Even though Fauci will be 82 and retired by then, the man needs to be held accountable for secretly creating the COVID virus with the Red Chinese, Bill Gates, George Soros, and the makers of “Game of Thrones” to control us via our precious bodily fluids.
While they’re at it, the House will also investigate the FBI for not liking Donald Trump, though they haven’t quite figured out who will investigate people who usually do the investigating. Doesn’t matter: Rep. Wrasslin’ Jim “Take it like a Man” Jordan, soon to be chair of the House Judiciary Committee, will figure something out. Maybe Ron DeSantis’ Election Kriminalpolizei can help.
They’ll investigate Ukraine and that weirdo president of theirs who disrespected the United States by not wearing a suit in his Kyiv bunker to address Congress.
Anyway, why doesn’t Zelensky like that nice Mr. Putin? Doesn’t he support Christian nationalism? Read more